I've made a lot of mistakes...

When I used to watch a lot of VH1 Classic for fun (don't ask), occasionally this live performance of "Rock On" would play in leiu of a traditional "music video," namely because most songs before the 80s didn't HAVE videos. I think pieces of said live performance are in the following video, and I always got a kick out of how much the mentally handicapable dude in the front seems to enjoy the show. You don't get the full effect here becuase it's just pieces, and because the quality of the vid is crap. But enjoy the smooth bass and sexy moves.



I didn't write anything the last 2 games, even though I half-heartedly sort of almost promised. But it would appear no one has noticed and no one has cared, so I got that going for me...which is nice.

Yada yada blow out the Pacers, yada yada watch the WINCE Show and blow a lead at the end. Everyone knows my boys are clinging tenuously to the 8th playoff spot. I almost liveblogged last night, but I was afraid of having to title a post "Tom Washington Hates My Mom, Redux." Oh yes, he was there. And I'm in the house of the olds. As it turns out, it didn't matter anyway because of ridiculous coaching decisions (or is that Vince saying "Fuck the coaching decisions"?) and another sad ending for the Jersey Heroes. The beginning of the game was ridiculous, with Mikki running around sans shoe for a full sequence and then Vince seemingly losing a kneecap (only to OBVIOUSLY return looking juuuust fine) and other various forms of mild ridiculousness. Before Vince bruised his fragile little knee, the announcing team was vehemently defending him taking bad shots, like "That wasn't a BAD shot, before you fans jump all over him...." Such is the state. So for those of you scoring at home that goes: Ridiculousness --> Winceage --> Sadnosity

Soooo...what are we in store for tonight? Well, the Sixers. Who have been playing well. It's a crapshoot. With playoff implications. Fantastic combinations.

Anyway. Don't call it a liveblog. (I've been here for years? No? That doesn't work? Ah well.) No, seriously, don't call it a liveblog, it's not gonna be one. I'm going back and forth w/ the Final Four and probably eating and talking about trannies w/ the rest of the fam at various points throughout, but I'm locked into sharing my very important observations with the beautiful people that frequent El Friends. You're all pieces of ass, right? I told the bouncer not to let in any fugs.

So speaking of pieces of ass...guess what I found? Oh yes, this is a photo gallery from the aforementioned baller fashion show. I shall spare you from RuPaul today though. I'm in a fantastic mood, so no need to bestow misery on anyone else.

Before the Nets get started...Roy Hibbert is a beast. That is all.

By the way, I am completely devestated that E. House is out for the rest of the season. See, they have to make the playoffs to let Casa play some more!

After just the first 2 minutes of play, I can see it's going to be "Ill Advised Jumpshot Night." ...Again.

Sweet bald spot on Andre Miller. Were his cornrows just falling right the fuck out? Is that why he went w/ the close cut? Yeesh.

Is it just me, or does "knee-to-knee" sound dirty?

Jason Collins: still useless.
I feel that update could be the sports equivalent of this.

So we have all abandoned the awful "Iggy Hop" nickname for Iguodala, right? It's not just good announcing by the Nets crew?

Here's another one...
Josh Boone: still ugly.

Boone had a sick game vs. Indy the other night. Of course his nice line (plus Boki's good game) overshadowed the shit game Vince put up. Don't think I didn't notice, Vince. I'm watching you. Well not right this second, because you're already sitting, in foul trouble. BUT I AM AWARE OF YOUR ACTIONS.

When Kyle freaking Korver is grabbing rebounds over both Boone and Moore, you know you are in for a fun basketball viewing experience.

Well last night's game was easily more interesting. I'm starting to think I should just give up again and check out the box score in a couple hours. Why is it so important to be a "real" fan anyway?

If I die tomorrow, at least I can say I saw Samuel Dalembert pick his nose before I went. Thanks for that, YES camera crew.

Chuck Norris Mountain Dew commercial- Fuck and yeah.
Although conspicuously absent from YouTube. Thanks for nothing, random internet uploaders.

I have never liked RJ taking long range J's. He continues to take many of them. Is he purposely trying to anger me? Likely not. But I have my suspicions.

By the way, I do love that Kevin Willis is back. He's like 50! My dad's like 50! I'm pretty sure Kevin Willis could beat up my dad though.

Antoine Wright: up and comer!
(Um...what?)

I like that Cliffy is like, "Well if Kevin Willis and his old ass is gonna keep playing, MY old ass is gonna keep playing." (Link via NetsDaily, as always. What would I do w/out them?)

Ah, fuck it. I'm going to Chili's.

*
*
*

Apparently Chili's is incapable of playing different things on different television sets. 4 TVs in the bar area...all on Joakim Noah's heinous face.

So I missed most of the rest of the game. But it's being described as "ugly," and Uncle Cliffy and Antoine Wright were the big time ballers. OK, I'm a terrible fan. It's a gradual process getting back on track.

And by "gradual," I mean the Nets don't play until Wednesday? And then it's versus the Hawks of Atlanta? Can life get better? I submit that it cannot.
(With all respect and credit to this guy.)




OK, on the post-game show, RJ's chillin in the locker room getting interviewed and wearing this like...plush robe? Maybe it's just a towel, I don't know. But I easily picture him wearing things like velvet robes around in his leisure activities. I bet he would drape himself in velvet if it were socially acceptable.

I kinda came home to the Rock on a whim straight from work yesterday, without having packed anything for the weekend...literally no clothes other than the (super cute!) ones I was wearing. So I had to go buy a couple items of clothing for the next few days. Which was nice, because as I have mentioned before, I buy (super cute!) underwear compulsively. Having an excuse this time was a pleasant change of pace. I suppose six pairs of undies for 4 days could be considered excessive. But like what if I need to chill an extra day or 2?

Apparently I'm starting to freak out about not having a job lined up for post-graduation, since I have randomly burst into tears somewhat due to the situation twice in the past week. Rationality tells me it's not a big deal and I have plenty of time. But it upsets me that something has not fallen into my lap thus far. Somebody has to want to pay me to do something, right? Ummm...wait, don't answer that.

You know what UCLA in the Final Four means? Ed O'Bannon stories! I guess if I go to another Nets game before the season ends, I should rock the old school replica Eddie O jersey, huh? Done and done.
Last we heard, Eddie was a car salesman. It sure does seem like an awfully long time ago that he was supposed to save the Nets. What's that? That was over a decade ago? Fuck, I'm old.

No, the "curse less and sound more ladylike because Dad says boys don't like girls who swear like sailors" project has not been going well. Why do you ask?

Oh, and congrats to Larry Frank for becoming the winningest coach in NJ Nets history.
Let's go win some playoff games, eh?

And nothing is up my sleeve....

I acknowledge the fact that I have been MIA lately. I'm certain no one has missed me terribly, but feel the need to explain myself anyway. My life is full of justifications and excuses, and it's not anything I can help really. Anyway, the Nets have been blessed (or cursed, depending who it is you're asking) with a bunch of consecutive days off. And I didn't watch the last 2 games against the Magic and Bobcats, due to various family and birthday obligations. In fact I have been spending a fair amount of time away from the computer in general over the last week or so and am way behind in all things sports, blogs and otherwise. On one hand I feel really out of it. On the other hand, I feel pretty good actually getting out and doing stuff with real humans. If there were a 3rd hand, I would lament that finals are coming up REALLY soon and I REALLY need to finally crack a book, but there are no mutants at El Friends.

Anyway, Wednesday night's game vs. Indiana is kind of important in terms of "playoff implications" and all that wonderful stuff (if you sense a bit of sarcasm, you are perceptive indeed) so I might try and bring the rock back for that. Maybe not though.

If anyone REALLY needs a Becky fix, you can check out my general musings on the Nets move to Brooklyn over at my new link love, Stop Mike Lupica, over yonder. And yeah...it's really happening. For realz.

Random note: went to my first Knicks game last week...and I have to say, you don't realize how ridiculously inconvenient the NBA fan experience at Continental is until you go try it somewhere else. Yeesh.

As a quick aside, some people I know have been finding this blog lately...it's resulted in some ridicule, some burned bridges, and some props (no, really!). Anyway, I just want to rerun a paragraph from a post back in January:

Man, if my mom ever actually read these things that I write...I shudder to think. I actually sent the url to someone I know for the first time this week because I had mentioned to my best friend in some context that I was blabbing to complete strangers on this thing (all 3 of y'all). I had started writing this thing in the interest of remaining completely anonymous and no one reading it...but if random people happened across it, at the very least no one I actually KNOW. I've put up a fair amount of embarrassing factoids, not to mention some pretty bitchy diatribes directed at other humans. And now that I think about it? How anonymous have I really been? You've got my name, my location, plenty of info re: my family and friends and schools and what not...I guess my point here is just "whoops." Because if anyone I knew were to find and read this, it would take them probably about 2 minutes to figure out it was me. I hope and pray this does not happen, but I realized it is possible. So if it does...well I've got no shame, give a holler and I'll make sure not to talk any shit about you. And Nesticle? If you made it past all the "sports stuff" and are actually reading? Hi, and love ya :)

Uncut and unedited in the interest of full disclosure. No real point though...just wanted to throw that (back) out there.

On a completely unrelated note, I had the pleasure this past weekend of discovering an incredibly talented band, entirely by accident. I went to see my sister play a set and as a result got to see a very rocking good time of a band afterward. I know alternative rock music is not for everyone, but if it is your thing, I have to imagine you will enjoy these guys. I very much did, and they were extremely cool and funny guys too. You can check them out here, or here. Music is a thing that I try not to get snotty about or act knowledgeable about, because I certainly am not an expert, and tastes are entirely subjective and personal. But I'm just gonna come out and say that I, Becky, personally thought that GreyMarket rocked pretty F'ing hard. I'd also like to reaffirm my fondness for this guy again too, since I'm even hearing one of his songs on the radio these days, and I did not think that would happen when I linked to his site way back in November.

Youuu better WORK.

So...I am kind of torn.
Should I go to the game tonight and sit up in the cheap seats (for free, via salon-purchased ticket package) or stay home and watch on TNT...?

One thing I do know is, via this link over at NetsDaily (as usual...they're all over everything!), I now have that RuPaul song stuck in my head.
Who is Jared M?
Casual Male apparently thinks he is going to be their cash cow....

In March, the company plans to launch Jared M., an upscale, custom-fit clothing boutique, which the company bought last year. Tailoring imported fabrics from Europe into suits that cost up to $6,000 apiece, Jared M. has built its reputation on outfitting professional athletes, many of whom are too tall for the clothes at regular stores. Most of Jared M.'s exclusive clients also spend an average of $45,000 per year on their wardrobes. "Big guys have vanity issues and definitely want to be in the forefront of fashion," says David Levin, CEO of Casual Male.

Anyway, I never realized Antoine Wright was such a good looking dude, but...WORK IT.
If you're curious what these high end fashions might look like, you can check out the media flip book at Jared M's web site.
There's a nice spread of our very own Captain Kidd, as well as some very debonaire shots of Antawn Jamison, Allan Houston (remember him?!) and Kevin Garnett. There are also a bunch of photos of Antoine Walker looking like a big dumb Antoine Walker, but in nice clothing.
Anyway, Jared M- making the handsome men of the NBA more handsome.

You know what?
Since it's stuck in my head, now it will be stuck in yours too:


Speaking of handsome men, my obviously FAVORITE Nets blog (yup, that's NetsDaily again) has acknowledged and compiled the pretty/nasty dunks that my main man Boki has been putting up. (My sister was like, "Who is #7, he's cute?" to my mom and I was like, "Nuh UH, bitch, I called him!")

Who's Next for 'The Slovenian Slammer'?
The posters haven't been printed yet, but the posterees know who they are: Elton Brand, Tim Duncan, Jermaine O'Neal and Samuel Dalembert. Boki Nachbar, the Slovenian Slammer, has taken each one of them to the rim...with authority. Nachbar says he has been getting a lot of text messages and email from his native land asking who will be next...some no doubt from his brother who plays for the Nachbar family's team in the Slovenian League.

Slovenian Slammer. Yeah. I like that.
Anyway, you can't link to single NetsDaily items, so here, here, here and here.
Annnnnd here is the story from The Record where Boki talks about dunking over Yao in practice when he was in Houston. He also talks about that sick dunk over Dalembert from a few weeks ago, which I posted right here on this very site! Hey Bostjan, that means we're like soul mates!

too too too many times....

I took a much needed break from the NCAA tournament (seriously, I sat on my ass for 3 straight days watching that shit, and I only had a few drinks) to attend Nets/Clippers w/ Ma, Pa, and the littlest sister. A few notes before my main rant...



Apparently tonight was Sly's birthday party. What that meant was an additional THIRTEEN mascots joining the party. 14 if you count Mini Sly. I asked my dad if he thought Mini Sly was a kid or a midget and he said "Definitely a midget." Man I hope he's right. Anyway. It was a little surreal having a) multiple mascots running around acting like morons; and b) mascots from OTHER TEAMS running around acting like morons. I'm not sure why, but seeing the bizarre Orlando Magic dragon (picture the Phanatic with multi-colored extra appendages) pumping up the Nets fans was a little strange. All props to Benny the (no I won't say "da") Bull for having the best dunk in the mascot dunk line...this paragraph has gotten too strange to even make a mascot in trouble w/ the law joke. It was all a little strange to witness. But while the crowd cheered louder for the flying t-shirts than for the Nets (the tragic demise of Maude Flanders has made me very conscious of the locations of the airborne tees) and this is something that makes me pretty sad as a general rule, I do have to say I felt a moderate amount of glee to hear one sound a bit louder than the cheers for the home team: the vociferous boos for the Philadelphia Eagles mascot. Because FUCK the Eagles, that's why. Hee. Anyway, happy birthday Sly. I didn't realize it had been 10 years, but time flies, I guess....

Speaking of mascots, I noticed G-Wiz (the Wizards mascot) wearing a "00" on his jersey, which is pretty standard, although I don't know if it used to be a singular zero before the AGENT of Zero came to town. Not really being up on my mascot trivia, I'm not entirely sure. I guess Gil doesn't mind as long as there is a numeric differentiation between who's got how many zeroes. Or...something...that sentence didn't make sense to me either. I have always wondered about our dear friend Sly though. He wears the #1...but so does Marcus Williams! At what point can Marcus be like, "Ummm...hey Mr. Thorn? Yeah, I was just wondering, um.... The guy in the doofy wolf costume is wearing my jersey number...any way we can fix that?" Does he need to be a starter before that can happen? Before him, Brandon Armstrong wore #1...but that was Brandon Armstrong, so I always just figured no one other than me realized.

And a big shout-out to Superdunk, the former Nets mascot whose existence has been all but erased, other than in my memory. At least according to a cursory Google Images search. Superdunk, we barely knew ye.

Anyway, just a sloppy game all around. It was full of blown defensive assignments, missed layups, boneheaded turnovers and botched dunks. Just an ugly one all around. Vince was, once again, a lot worse than his stat line would indicate. (Now is a good time to mention his new nickname, "Air Pussy," courtesy of the sexiness over at Stop Mike Lupica.) Mikki had 2 fouls too quickly, so he was a non-factor in the first half. Boki was ice cold until the end. Maggette started the game off w/ a jumper and I said to my dad, "Watch...he's gonna do that all night." Sure enough.... Frank had RJ on him all night, and RJ, bless his 100% effort giving heart, is still a full step slow on defense due to his ankle. Poor E. House was visibly frustrated at not being able to get it going at all. (I did watch him all through warm-ups/intros again, and I stand by my previous assertion that he's the most important "glue" guy on the team.) JKidd looked great, actually. His head was in it, and he took it over when he had to (i.e. when Carter disappeared for long stretches at a time) and just made great decisions. It's my least favorite new sportscaster thing to say - "This guy just makes great decisions down the stretch!" - but in JKidd's case, at least for tonight, it was true.
In any event, a win is a win, and right now those is im-po-tent.

Day late update:
Vid of my favorite part-


Oh, and after watching them hang out down in front of my section all game, I feel confident saying that the Team Hype guys have amazing arms. But also that they're probably gay.
(Dear Team Hype guys: You may prove me wrong if you so desire. Lemme know. Love, Becky)

So, the rant...
OK. With all due love, respect and thanks to my father for taking me to games all these years, and especially tonight...
He is guilty of one of the most loathsome fan practices known to man: leaving early.

Now I'm willing to accept the fact that sometimes your team is part of a 30-point blow-out and watching the 12th man get in might be less important than beating traffic. But a 2-point game with 5 minutes left??? Ugh. It's like...why buy tickets to the game if you don't want to actually WATCH THE GAME??? I'm a huge NBA fan, so I hate when people say this, but apparently many people feel very strongly that the only part of an NBA game worth watching is the last 2 minutes. So even if you want to watch the rest, won't the last 2 minutes quite possibly be the best?? Or even if not, I mean...you're a FAN, aren't you? If TRAFFIC is really your #1 concern, do what I do, and wait it out...wait an extra 5-10 minutes after the game ends and let everyone ELSE rush out. I don't know, this may just be a Becky thing, but I hated myself for leaving the game w/ the result still up in the air. It's like...what's the point of going if you don't actually care about watching the drama of the game unfold?
"He who leaves before the bell tolls, fails to see his team's story unfold," or whatever the hell the line is from that commercial w/ Phil Jackson. It's a stupid commercial, no doubt, but it's RIGHT! Like I understand my dad isn't as hardcore a fan as I am, and my mom wants him to be happy because her life is easier that way, and my sister was being a cunt tonight for no apparent reason so she wanted to leave asap, but...I dunno. I don't really have a point, except to say that I abhor the "leave early to beat the traffic" people. Unless you have little kids that need to be put to bed or something, it's just inexcusable. Like, OK Dad, you work late and don't get a chance to follow the team that closely, but tonight you are actually AT THE GAME! Stay and enjoy it! If not, just hand over your Nets shirt because I'm confiscating your fandom until you are ready to use it properly.

Did I just eat that, or did I rub it on my face???

Never order Chinese/Japanese food when someone else is paying and you are hungry.

After doing delightfully well on my brackets throughout the day, Duke just fucked me as they do every single year and I have now switched over to the Nets/Heat game in disgust. No one needs to give me a hard time for taking them at all (let alone into the 8). I know. I just assume every year that they will stop fucking me. You would think I would have learned when they were the only school to reject me when I applied to colleges. (OK, and UVA...but fuck UVA. Because I said so, that's why.) Anyway. I sat in my pajamas watching basketball from the time I woke up (correlated very carefully with the first tipoff) until they stopped. We're getting shitty weather on my spring break (SPRING BREAK '07 ROCKLAND COUNTY, NEW YORK! WOO!!!) so I have no intentions of leaving my house much...or at all...over the next couple days. I intended to catch up on work for the semester, but...yeahhh...that's not gonna happen. This could be relaxing though! Oh yeah, and fuck the snow...I'm gonna go to the tanning place enough times so that it at least LOOKS like I went somewhere. Screw you, pale gene. Becky shall rise above.

Speaking of the NCAA...the folks over at Texas A&M are a little angry with our boy Antoine Wright. But to be fair...he's right and he's telling the truth. And if an athlete wants to actually say "You know what...education SHOULD be more important for college athletes," then fucking praise be to him. You get the feeling these athletes are happy to have passes and not have to worry about learning anything, but you never wonder if maybe they're pressured NOT to learn? I'm not saying that's what Wright was implying, but it might be the implication. And if so...rock on. If a kid wants to challenge himself, I don't see why he would be discouraged from that. So I genuinely hope I'm reading that wrong.

My mom abandoned me to toggle the Nets game with Grey's Anatomy. I can honestly say that I have never and will never watch a single episode of that show. I saw about 10 minutes once by accident in the student lounge during finals last year. (Yes, I was trying to put on a playoff game...yes, to anyone who read the old post about the ass clown w/ CSI: Miami, I do seem to run into that problem a lot.) It just seemed so awful. Just nothing I would be interested in. Characters you wouldn't want to hang around with or bear to be around in real life. I dunno, it's tough to explain. Let my dad:

Becky: Dad, why don't you watch Grey's w/ Mom?
Dad: It's just so...whiny.

Ah.

As an aside (ha...this whole post is an aside), we were discussing a friend of mine and my dad said, "Some of us just don't see ourselves in the light that other people do," or something like that. And I was like, "Come on, dad...that's true for most people, but you and I are incredibly self aware. We actually ARE as awesome as we believe ourselves to be." He looked at me funny. I don't think people get me.

Before she disappeared, mi madre did have the opportunity to tell me she's noticed Uncle Cliffy is "completely useless" these days.
Becky: Maybe he only plays well when he's high.
Mom: ...Probably.

The Heat just went up by 7 and I'm starting to get the "Angry Becky" demeanor. That's when I drop random F-bombs (not very ladylike, I know, I'm working on breaking that habit) and roll my eyes as if there were someone here to acknowledge my commentary on frustration and annoyance.

Least favorite commercial right now: for "Icon," I think it's called...the video game about rappers? Using their music...as weapons? It's got gross yet oddly unrealistic throbbing innards and eyeball...and a truly horrific rap song...and the maddening prospect of using music...as a WEAPON. You have lost me, Def Jam. I thought I was ghetto fab. I can see now this is not the case. I give up. You have defeated me. I'll go buy a Death Cab album and bask in my Causasianness.

And while I'm bitching about commercials, I mentioned this in one of the comments threads on the Deadspin live blogs earlier today (big ups to Dan Shanoff for holding it down and rocking my socks all day), the new DirecTV commercial with the Entourage douchebags is quite possibly the most irritating thing in the world. As if Turtle and the rest (but Turtle especially) were not annoying enough on the show, now they're shilling for DirecTV? Those commercials annoyed me before and now I have to listen to these d-bags use the word "honies" and turn down floor seats to the Lakers? Jessica Simpson's spot was annoying in dialogue but at least if you mute her, you nod in appreciation instead of rolling your eyes at the screen (looking your way, fat douchebag who plays Turtle). "Entourage" was one of those shows that everybody was watching, so I checked it out and it was mildly enjoyable (in the first season) so I didn't develop an intense hatred for it immediately. It's kind of a one-trick pony though, and the storylines and characters got progressively more stupid and more annoying. I attempted to not watch it anymore, and successfully skipped a couple episodes. But then I got back together w/ Senor Douchebag one of the times, and he and his roommates thought they were "just like them, dude." Or at least wanted to be. SO, their Sunday nights revolved around watching "Entourage," and therefore mine did as well. When it comes back this season though? Not so much, sucka! The fact that Piven apparently now acts/thinks like he is Ari Gold in real life seals that deal. When I'm supposed to believe that a dude w/ bad hair plugs, who waxes his chest and used to make a living fucking John Cusack's fallout pussy is a big shot, I'm tuning the F out. But don't worry, Adrian Grenier. You'll always be Chase Hammond to me.

(This is the part where I shamefully admit to having an unapologetic love for that movie. Seriously. I own the dvd and have probably watched it close to 100x. You may judge me. But first you must acknowledge how hard I rock anyway. Proceed.)

While I'm bitching about commercials and what not...the geniuses (read: jerkoffs) behind the trailer for Pride are going to owe me $10.50 if I actually go see that piece of garbage. Because they know...KNOW that putting "Remember the Name" in it is gonna get me. I'm convinced. And of course it won't be in the movie. The only reason I got so pumped about Gridiron Gang and moved it to the top of my NetFlix queue was because one of the commercials for the dvd that had that song in it came on tv one night. Then it wasn't even in the goddamned movie. Sadnosity. Of course I enjoyed it anyway...I'm such a sucker for a cheesy sports movie, the way most girls are with...I guess "Grey's", ha. My favorite part was laughing at all of The Rock's over the top lines...and then seeing the documentary clips of the real life dude using those exact lines in REAL LIFE. Fantastic. Anyway, I'm going to ignore the obvious jokes about the swimming movie, and...let's just collectively hope I don't spend any money to see it.
(Related note: I'm sincerely fighting the urge to put Roll Bounce or whatever the roller skating version of the same movie was called at the top of my queue...I caught 5 minutes of it on tv the other night and it was hilarious.)

The Nets never want to make things easy on me. I'm convinced in the pregame talks they're like, "Yo...there's definitely a cute fan sitting at home watching us while everyone else watches the NCAA tournament...let's play from behind the whole game and then try and win it right at the end, just to mess with her." OK, probably not. But still.
I do love Eddie House though. Just let E. House go crazy.

Speaking of crazy, when I was stuck at work the other day lamenting my utterly depressing spring break plans (i.e. none), in order to make myself feel better, I online shopped (it's a bit of an addiction that I have). I bought myself a bikini (w/ strawberries on it because I am uncharacteristically a sucker for cute things) out of protest. "Oh, I'm not going anywhere on spring break and probably won't see the beach for MONTHS...but I can still buy a bikini, YEAH. That'll show them." I don't know who the aforementioned "them" are, but...well, now I gots me a new bathingsuit. Rock. I also bought a pair of red heels, because...god knows. I don't need them and I'm not even sure what they would go with, but...they were on sale and I HAD to have them.

(This is the part where I admit I have a problem.)

Antoine Walker is making shots. I detest Antoine Walker. I just typed out a whole rant about everything I despise about the man and his game, but then I thought that I had covered this ground before so I deleted it. It might have been in a comments thread of another blog but...I don't know and I don't really care.

Oh Christ...when the "Hack-a-Shaq" crap starts up and he's actually making the free throws? Time for me to check out. Because bitching about a game as it unfolds on a blog is quite possibly a low point, even for me.

Just to drag y'all down with me a bit, I found the offending commercial from above. :)


I had mentioned the Senior Dance Squad or whatever they're called after I went to the game a couple weeks ago...USA Today had a cute story about them yesterday (via NetsDaily today). There are even some hot pics of sexy geriatrics shaking their groove thangs, if that's your thang.

On a somewhat related (and pretty personal) note, my grandmother recently had surgery for breast cancer...and for some reason, my suggestions for her to "get herself a new pair of big ass tittays" have gone ignored and scorned by every member of my family. I really DON'T think people get me.

To finish up on a lighter note (no, the Nets aren't going to supply THAT luxury tonight)...
My high school English teacher. My one sister also had him a couple years ago and my other sister has him now...he's just fantastic. Brilliant, brilliant man. We used to joke that he had every bit of useless knowledge you could imagine, and that you could randomly ask him the capital of Zimbabwe and he would know it...one day we were clowning and asked him and he did. Not that it's like crazy random information, but that was the joke and he really did know everything. Rhodes scholar, talented with the guitar, able to balance chairs on his chin and stuff like that...and his favorite hobby was visiting the graves of famous people and taking pictures of himself lying on them. I found the article on the page for a Facebook group my sister joined, "I Wish My English Professor Could Teach As Well As Doctor Wilson Did." For realz. At the end of my experience with ohhh...three colleges and a law school, I can say he is still one of the top 5 teachers I ever had. He's so awesome, and that article...wow. Just wow. Rock on, Doc Wilson. Rock the F on. (I'll be damned if I root for the Rays though. That's just weird.)

Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.

(Note: I started writing this pretty much right after the game and then got interrupted...so the AP probably beat me to most of this.)

I do believe that makes a win streak!

I know, I promised a post last night, but something came up, as "somethings" invariably do.

Anyway, I didn't really have the heart to blog about last night's game, because even though it was a W, it was still "meh," as Becky likes to say in sound effect. (Can I pull off the 3rd person? No, I didn't think so either.) It was one of those games that should have been put away early, but obviously wasn't, and Vince still did all his annoying crap but for whatever reason his line totally hid the fact that he made me smack my forehead a couple times. RJ does look great, I have to say. His "pop" isn't quite there yet, but he's back! I've mentioned this before, but one thing you can always count on is RJ playing his butt off. He doesn't take games off. (Speaking of...fantastic work over at TrueHoop as usual.) And that is why he is my favorite Net. OK, second favorite behind His Bokiness, who continues to astound. Marv and Mark were pointing out how RJ being out gave Boki the chance to build up some confidence and such and now he can be the spark off the bench. Between those two and Mikki, I can honestly say there are at least 3 guys busting their asses on the court every night again. You know what? I'll even throw E. House in there too, even if he is a liiiiittle bit of a liability on D. And we'll overlook the fact that Boki did almost ruin it w/ a stupid foul at the end. Also will ignore the reediculous free throw shooting and skip the whole "I mean...they're free!" commentary. OK so it's not all completely back on track just yet, but at this point what's the difference between 8th in the playoffs and last in the lottery? 17 games left. We'll just have to wait and see how it shakes out.

Such a nice change to get Marv and Mark after the yahoos they got doing the call in Memphis last night. I guess it's not a fair comparison at all, as Albert and Jackson are clearly the gold standard, and would be in national broadcasting as well. But I dunno WHAT was going on last night, they kept talking about how the color guy was drafted a long time ago and really the story was not at all interesting and therefore not worth me looking up how to spell his name. Plus they (and this is a problem w/ a lot of the local teams) did not do their homework and spent a good portion of the broadcast expounding on the "great" and "surprising" story that Mikki Moore has been for the Nets. Ummm...maybe worth one mention to get the yokels back on track, but come on, anyone who pays peripheral attention to the NBA knows about Mikki and his snakes and hard-luck journeyman tales. Also, they enthusiastically credited a basket (or 2) to "CHUCKY WATSON!!!" Ummm...OK. In fact, I know I said I wouldn't rip on them but dude...they also called Moore an "activity guy," which meant you "don't want to have a window open around him." I have no idea WTF that means. OK. That's all. I promise.



For some reason, the Memphis PA controlling dudes are still piping "Laffy Taffy" into the arena. This seems like a cruel form of torture. Someone send help.

Quick note on the OKC crowd. I had seen it before but forgotten all about it...the crowd does that thing that college fans do where they remain standing at the beginning of the game until their team scores. That fucking rocks. The Hornets didn't score for almost 3 minutes! I fully support The OKC's endeavor in getting a team, it's fantastic to see a fan base that actually cares, rather than a hot team with an empty arena like the Heat. (Yeah yeah yeah...and the Nets. Whatever.) It's a shame the Hornets can't stay...why do they want to go back to New Orleans anyway? I can't imagine their fan base is too excited about the Hornets w/ all the bingeing and purging and date raping and all distracting them. Oh, they need the team to help build their economy back up and BLAH BLAH BLAH? Whatever dude, if they didn't want ot lose their NBA team, they shouldn't have built their stupid city in a giant BOWL. Ummm...just kidding? I'm just sayin'. OKC should have a team. And anyone protesting the thought of the Hornets moving seemed to be more along the lines of "Don't do that to the city of New Orleans." Juxtapose that with the Seattle "Don't take our Sonics away from us" and you see what I mean. Maybe.

All this disparaging talk of other cities is probably just because I am exceedingly bitter that I am stuck in NY on my very last spring break ever. Maybe I'm a stupid spoiled whore, but it's the first spring break I haven't done ANYTHING. In high school I went away w/ my family every year and in college I always made it at least as far south as Atlanta. First year of law school I went to South Beach and last year I went to the Whale's Vagina for my first (and only) visit to the great state of California. This year...I just couldn't get anything together. And again, apologies for being a stupid spoiled whore, but it's fucking depressing. I know I got to extend my college experience by 3 years for all intents and purposes, but darn it, it's my last spring break and I'll be a brat if I want to.

Annnnyway. Digression passed. When I go to write about the Nets, I generally look for an angle and go with it. But I haven't really figured out what this team is about yet. I'm kind of hoping Vince will be more motivated now that RJ is back, but we'll see. I have yet to figure out what drives Vince, what it is that makes him either try or not try. It's a freaking mystery and it drives me a little crazy. So to sum up. No angle. No answers. But...2 wins and the 7th seed for right now! Woo!

The real excitement, of course, is the HUGE matchup between the Suns and the Mavs tomorrow night (tonight, I guess, if you wanna get all technical and stuff). I absolutely LOVE both these teams. I believe Dirk and Cuban are 2 of the more compelling characters in the league. And after reading Seven Seconds, I obviously have a big non-sexual crush on the entire Phoenix organization.
So in the spirit of this exciting excitement, here is Dirk and JT (2 gods in once place...catch me). Here is the Suns video page; their marketing department showcases some brilliant work.
And here...is this:

I know it's not new but gosh darn it makes me one happy Becky. Anyone else notice Dirk is wearing a backwards SHAWN BRADLEY jersey too???
I LOVE THIS GAME!


Have a safe Wednesday, kiddies. I'll bring the sexy back real soon.

I see PRIDE. I see POWER. I see a BADASS MOTHA...

I'm sorry for neglecting all you hardcore Nets fans the past week or so. All...zero of you. But seriously, it has actually been a week filled with studying, plus one night of hardcore drinking, and a game on NBATV that I couldn't watch. I probably won't be able to watch the Spurs game too closely tonight either (if at all). And I have a lot of Nets-related reading to catch up on. HOWEVA. You have my undying pledge to bring you all the hot sweaty Nets-on-Spaniard action going on Monday night in Memphis.
In the meantime, check out how impartial observers view the Nets over at Stop Mike Lupica. The studs over there sum up pretty well why this team is sometimes (oftentimes) painful to watch.

There is so much college basketball on right now that I want to watch, but...I'm exhausted and Cool Runnings is on. Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up! It's bobsled time! Yeah I caught it JUST when it started too. I'm a loser. But I'm money.

I'm not in the habit of writing reviews of movies, television shows (my expressed disdain for "My Boys" notwithstanding) or music. This is due to the fact that I am not even close to knowledgeable enough to make accurate assessments of the quality of these mediums. I have no technical training in music composition, screenwriting, film production, etc. etc. etc. I leave it to the professionals to write the reviews because even though I know they're a) talking out of their asses most of the time; and b) highly unlikely to know what I personally would or would not like, they are the experts. And really, I figure no one gives a shit what my opinions are and are perfectly willing and able to form their own if they see fit.

Now. That having been said. I just got back from an afternoon trip to the movie theater to see 300. And. Well.... I was absolutely and completely blown out of the water. I kept thinking throughout the whole thing, "I love everything about this movie," then reminding myself there was still so much left that I shouldn't prematurely make those statements (or the shorter inner monologue version of such thoughts). Then it ended and...wow. Just wow. I cannot recommend it highly enough. And I don't think I have to, because everyone I know was equally pumped for this movie to come out. But let me say this- even if you are NOT a fan of senseless violence (note: I am!), this is one of the most visually amazing films I have ever seen. (I thought Sin City was cool as hell in this regard, but didn't find it "breathtaking," per se.) If you have the appreciation for any type of aesthetics, you'll agree w/ me on how unbelievable 300 was. I don't want to gush anymore about it since I'm sure all the reviews say the same type of thing (I try not to read a movie's reviews until after I see them so I don't really know). But it was by far the best movie I have seen in a really long time and just wanted to throw that out there. I 100% loved it. There were 4 legitimate chill scenes (apologies for the Simmons etymology) and an actual strong female character that didn't annoy the hell out of me. This girl found her $10.50 well spent.
One more thing though. During the battle scenes, I found my EYES TEARING because I unintentionally DIDN'T WANT TO BLINK.

Even though the movie rocked me so hard, there were a couple lines worth giggling at, some sweet HoYay to enjoy, and of course some MAN CANDY!
Now, about that....

First of all, what is it about Dominic West? I don't generally go for old guys, but he is a big pile of sex. And he is amazing on "The Wire." Why is it he only seems to get cast as super douchebags these days then??? Seriously, I had that thought watching Hannibal Rising (utter crap, by the way) and then again today...next time Dom, PLEASE take a role where I can like you. Because...I LIKE you. That doesn't necessarily mean "good guy" either. I've been known to love a villain. I like bad boys as much as the next gal. Just don't play anymore douches like these last 2...k?

Now. Rodrigo Santoro is absolutely gorgeous. I'll confess, I am completely obsessed with "Lost." And while we're on the subject, it's pretty awful how all of a sudden we're just supposed to believe Santoro's character and his wife have... been on the island the whole time! We swear! Didn't you see them?!




Anyway, I did not even recognize him as Xerxes AT ALL. The obvious joke is to compare Xerxes with Dhalsim.



However...may I offer a slightly more entertaining comparison?



After my friend pointed it out the first time Xerxes showed up in the movie, well...that pretty much ruined the thin fabric of "take Xerxes seriously as a god and dictator" believability. Oh well.

Anyway. 300. If you don't like this movie, we probably can't be friends.

Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies, for every night of the week I got an alibi.

I wonder if he's doing it on purpose to see if we are paying attention...

"Oh, yeah. I'm just going to keep shooting and keep being aggressive," Carter said. "I got the shots I wanted -- I think I forced a couple, two or three shots that after I took them I wasn't very happy with them but it happens."

Anyway. Tough road trip starts tonight. It will probably make or break the season for the Nets. Anything can happen and I have no idea what that means.

I have been wanting to write a post on a specific song from a specific album and cannot find the full lyrics, so I might not be able to do it as soon as I had originally wanted to. But it will come, and it will be fantastic. And if you guessed the album is Shaq Diesel, then you are right.

On a consumerist front, I am incredibly excited about my latest purchase.

OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Posterized! by my looooove...



Not talking about the game. Yeah, I watched it. Whatever. Really not what you need before you start out a West Coast road trip in Big D.

Thanks to Dime for finding the sweet vid.

Ugh.

I'll never boo you, but oh my goodness do I hate you.



What was that, 5 straight misses to end the game? I lost count. Dick.

Oh, and shut up, Tim Capstraw. Just shut up.

Game's so tight they call it virgin.

This started a few weeks ago when my friend joked that I had a "whole team," erroneously. At the time I was merely juggling 2 dudes, and one was on the way out. Within a week though, 2 new ones (or not so much new, but forgotten prospects) popped up randomly through no prompting by me at all. So I IMed her, "You know...there might be something to this whole 'team' analogy of yours." I fleshed it out a bit and then sent it to my best guy friend...and the "Team" was born.

I find the analogy amusing, but will likely not update on the situation anymore. Eventually (probably pretty soon), some guy I am actually interested in will find and read this site and I will feel like an asshole because someone's feelings will be hurt. And really, I like ALL these guys, they are all great and the truth is I realize that "it's not them, it's me." I'm currently trying to "ween them off the Becky" as my friend says, because as bitchy and detached I have been lately is not something any one of them deserves.

Anyway. Without further ado...the Team. Nicknames lovingly created and explained for this post (OK, some of them were previously in existence).

G- The Fallon Fan
So named because he REALLY likes Jimmy Fallon...in fact the night I learned this was the night he lost all of my respect and affection. No joke, it was dead in the water right there. Call me shallow, but Fallon is a dealbreaker.
Most experienced player on the team. He's been around the longest and is a cagey vet. His game has slipped big time, but he has been loyal to the organization, so you don't want to cut him. Occasionally still comes up big, but is mostly there for moral support at this point.
He's Reggie Miller at the end of his career.

G- The Jew
So named because...well, he's Jewish. Not a derogatory name, just an incredulous one. I never date Jewish guys, and likely never will again. He's an anomaly. The exception that proves the rule. Mom and Dad will be sad to hear when he is gone. Oh well.
Captain of the team. Flashy and talented player. He plays the most minutes. Looks absolutely perfect on paper. Unfortunately can be very very streaky. Goes cold for long periods of time. You really want him to be a superstar but he just can't seem to string together consecutive great games. Some of the public criticizes him vehemently. He does have some diehard fans though.
He's Vince Carter.

F- The Busboy
So named because I met him on the bus. Which is not as sketchy as it sounds. We're from towns near one another and waited for a bus home together and then sat near each other on the bus.
Promising young player. Seems to have a skill set that fits well within the offense. Was hurt and missed the majority of the last couple seasons though. No one's really sure if he can contribute consistently or if he'll remain injury prone throughout his career. Definitely has some upside though.
He's Nene, only without the ridiculous contract.

F- Blue Balls
Not what you're thinking. Met him in one of my favorite local establishments watching b-ball and somehow he ended up challenging my dad to a game of raquetball while I was on the phone with my parents. Has blue eyes too. Ummm OK then, let's just call him Blue.
Rookie. Still adjusting to playing in the league. The coaching staff is still unsure as to what will be the best way to use him. Has Tremendous Upside Potential. Also could be a total bust. No one has really seen what he can do yet in limited minutes.
He's Tyrus Thomas.

C- None yet.
That's been the joke: "Currently searching for my starting center."
There are a bunch of "You can't teach size" and "Clog up the paint" jokes in there too, but I'm just gonna leave that one alone.
What you need though is an anchor, someone you can depend on, someone that won't put up gaudy numbers but will quietly step in and take over a game if need be.
Like Yao Ming.
Someday....

I've got the cute new intern pegged as a college player to work out during the pre-draft camps maybe....
He's...I don't know, I don't follow CBB closely enough to make an accurate comparison without screwing it up.

Then there is the player who recently split from his long-term team in a somewhat messy fashion. There was talk of discourse and a possible end to the relationship on and off for awhile...trade demands, trade talk, etc. Finally the team told him they were done with him. He was fine with that. But there is obviously a lot of baggage that comes with a player like that. And you don't know if the player will fit in with your system. Could be worth taking a gamble on. Could be more hassle than he's worth.
He's Allen Iverson this season.

I've also got the equivalent to a Euro prospect. He's far away and I have yet to see him play myself, but the scouts say he's the next coming of Dirk Nowitski.

I have a player who I really covet and make a play for every year around the trade deadline, but because of his situation, he is available but remarkably difficult to obtain. I can never seem to put the right package together to make a trade happen.
He's Kevin Garnett.

Of course, there is the great player that left in free agency, whose contract talks you really wish you had handled differently. Yes, he seems happy on his new team. Yes, that makes me want to throw things at the wall. (Just kidding about that last part. Call me!)
He's Steve Nash.

Sadly, I have a whole slew of Ron Artests in my past- freaking psychos to whom I had to just say, "Go home until I unload you".
(Speaking of, AWESOME. My mom classifies learning disabilities for a living and she swears up and down that Ron-Ron has some pretty serious ones. It's almost kind of sad that no one has realized it and pegged it as the reason he's such a nut.)

Anyway. That about wraps it up. I am clearly the superior and wise coach, trying to make this crazy bunch work out. To be honest, I'm feeling really exhausted and kind of want to quit entirely. It all just feels like too much to deal with at the moment and I want to just chill. If only there were a player who fit into my life in a non-annoying and non-threatening manner.
I guess I'm the hot chick version of Pat Riley.