So many things stressing and pissing me off these days. Rather than be a bitch to everyone I know, I'm gonna blog it out.
Job stuff. Being given insufficient resources and nearly impossible goals/deadlines is immensely frustrating. Being told it's up to you to come up with ideas on how to circumvent these issues and if you fail, then it's your ass on the line...not so much frustrating as maddening.
As if that weren't bad enough...things completely out of my control could dictate whether I even HAVE a job in 2 months. And that's it. For 8 weeks, I'll be in the dark. Then, I might still have the job I have now (shitty), I might have no job whatsoever (shittier) and I might have a sweet newish job with higher pay (not even a little bit shitty). I'm hoping for that last one. In case you couldn't tell.
If I have no job, it makes the fact that I'm trying to move back to NYC in 3 weeks a pretty bad idea. And yes, the apartment hunt is a nightmare, mostly since I haven't had a chance to participate much. So I can't blame anyone else for it being fucked...much. Stressful.
Not sleeping. I haven't slept through the night in...I don't know how long. It sucks. I'm tired all the time and I look like helllll. That coupled with the fact I worked my ass off all summer and never got a tan is not helping my appearance.
Driving long distances. Makes my ass hurt. Yet dealing with the airlines makes my head hurt.
Broken phones. 2nd one in 2 months. The first one was my fault...conceded. But I learned my lesson about getting completely drunk with an open purse while playing with dogs and doing karate on cement. But this time I didn't throw or drop the phone...I didn't really slam it down...too hard. Either way, I hate being without phone, I hate how NOT helpful phone companies' tech support is, and I especially hate being able to hear texts come in without being able to see them. Fucking terrible.
Boys. They are stupid. Even the ones I'm not at all interested in find a way to anger me.
Hint to take, please, finally - 20 separate reasons that I can't go out with you = 1 giant reason I won't go out with you: I DO NOT WANT TO.
To someone I have only and will only refer to as Desperate & Delusional - my humoring the freakshow that is your entire life because I am required to as part of my job is NOT an invitation to spread rumors that I would ever hang out with you, let alone that YOU stood ME up. Even if anyone believes your pathetic tall tales, keep my name out of your mouth if you don't want a swift knee to the balls when I finally am no longer in a position where I have to tolerate your unbearable presence. I don't care if you "wanted to know what it felt like to leave a hot girl hanging." Your very existence sickens me and while earlier I felt badly for you due to your extreme pathetic nature, I now want nothing more than to completely avoid you until the end of time. Ew, and gross. And just so you know, everyone knows your "girlfriend" is a hooker. Congrats on the upgrade from inflatable though!
And to my new friend - not even a girl who wanted to get with you would buy the "My marriage is over but I still wear the wedding ring as a fashion statement just because I like it, even though I'm not wearing it right now because I thought you didn't notice it the last time I saw you because I was shadily trying to hide my hand in my pocket" story. It would take a giant moron. I'm not one.
The NBA and MLB. Or my teams. Yeah, the Yankees suck. Not that it's a surprise this season, but it's still a little depressing. And the Nets...I'm still not sure I'm ready to talk about them at length. But the players I liked are pretty much all gone. The players I'll be watching all season are not my favorites. I predict a brutal season, and last place in the division. NO PLAYOFFS TIL BROOKLYN, as they say. But guess what? I'll still watch most of the games. Real fan and all. Unlike some people, just because something doesn't go the way I want (we all have to deal with losing seasons and heartbreaking playoff losses sometimes), I'm not going to come up with some bullshit excuse why I "can't" watch them anymore or some bullshit justification of why they don't "deserve" my fandom and viewership. I won't cast myself as the victim because I don't like the level of effort in certain players and then use that as an excuse to not follow a team just because they're not winning. That's reserved for self-obsessed pussies. If anything was going to drive me away from this team, it would be a Lopez twin, the black hole of suck that is Yi, and Captain Carter. Fandom is for better or worse though. So in addition to looking forward the NBA season in general (and despite the negativity of the post, I really am), I'm still trying to drink the Nets Kool-Aid. Because if I don't, it's gonna be a loooooooong season.
So some optimism to close.
Football is back! Being a fan of the Super Bowl champs is a nice perk.
Live games are awesome, and the past year I've broadened my horizons quite a bit from the local teams. The homes of the Nationals, Orioles, Wizards, Redskins, Capitals, Phillies, and Bills have all proven to be a lot of fun, adverse fans and all. But I do hate being away from NYC. So I guess I'm back to the apartment search now...especially since I can't sleep. Fuck.